Now then I realised how important it is to let go.

You see, I was so caught up with the past, caught up with Kai specifically, that I didn't live in my present. I refused to move on and refused to let anyone else come in and in the end break my heart all over again. I was tired. I was afraid. And what's worse, I still hadn't let go despite the fact that it was over for about more than a year already.

He was there, all along. But I decided to keep him as my good friend, as one of my best friends whom I could rely on no matter what. He was there when I was staying out of the house because of that useless moron, not him. He was there when I was at my lowest and brought me out riding at night because he knew that would cheer me up, not him. He was there when I'm alone, not him. He was there when I was so sick and needed someone to bring me to the doctor, not him.

But being the idiot that I am, of course I still clung on. Clung on to what?

Nothing.

He was probably out there doing whatever he is doing, not giving any shit thought about me while I was all weepy and moping around, waiting for...absolutely nothing.

Sometimes, the friend whom you least expect to be there for you, happens to be around all the time. The ones whom you count and depend on, more often than not, disappoint you in more ways than you can ever imagined.

Let go. I learnt this important lesson of letting go.
Let go of the past because being caught up in it would only bring about more heartache in the present, much less the future. Let go, because the person whom you've been looking for all the time may be in the present, not the past.

I've already let go - of everything that was meant to be forgotten a long time ago.
But letting go of what's just happened...it'll happen eventually. Just not now.