Syida and I have been talking about this pretty often:
We miss being chased/wooed by the guys who happen to hold the title of "boyfriend" in our lives.

You know those days when he was all out to get a bit of your attention even if it's just a glance or a smile of acknowledgement from you?
(obviously this mainly apply to girls but for those exceptional cases, well, if it applies to you then...okay.)
And then comes in those sugar-coated text messages, asking how you are, how your day went with that hint of flirting which makes you feel like you're someone so goddamn special? Well of course you'd be looking forward to all these small text conversations because, hey, it makes you happy. Then there'll be late night chats at least once or twice a week up till the wee hours of the morning, with him being the first one to text you the next morning, asking whether or not you've slept well.
He'd always be the one who initiate dates and would accompany you till late if you have an assignment to complete during night time. Your mornings were made daily with that small message or phonecall wishing you a good morning. And maybe after a day out (even of doing nothing significant), there'll be this small gesture of appreciation from him to you for spending an amazing day with him and stuff like that. Oh yes, of course, he would definitely take every opportunity there is to surprise you by popping up somewhere unexpectedly to accompany you when you happen to be alone or surprise you with a gift when there's a special occasion or somesort. And if you feel low or have one of those days when you felt like an ugly duckling or whatever, he'd be the one telling you how beautiful (not hot or sexy) you are and again, make you feel like you're on cloud nine and every other pessimistic thoughts just fade away into oblivion. He'd barely get angry or show that he's moody when he's around you and vulgarities were a definite no-no.
All those sweet, sweet things that he did which makes you fall so helplessly and so madly in love with that perfect gentleman. Everything seems to be so fairytale-like and you just really can't help falling deeper each time.

Then, maybe a couple of years passed and you can't help but notice all those abovementioned seems to gradually, slowly but surely, begin to disintegrate. Okay, maybe not all began to disappear but it's not like as if they happen very often too either, no? Like how Syida puts it, once they've already gotten what they want (apparently, us), then they somehow take it for granted.
Yes, I know it'd be absurd for that fellow to pop you with surprises every single day and talk all night long with you every other day but once in a while, doesn't seem to hurt, right? And when you've really grown onto each other, your conversations get a lot more comfortable that sometimes, occasionally, a bit of vulgarity got accidentally slip out of your mouths. Making fun of each other is a normal thing and you won't always have to be worried that your significant other is insulted because you know that they know you're just merely joking. In a way, things have gotten to that comfortable zone that you don't feel the need to be so formal with each other anymore. Like, you can burp as loudly as you'd like when you feel like it, you can look and sound stupid without giving a care in the world, you can burst into tears and laugh out loud the next moment, you don't have to worry about looking stupid because he'll tell you when you are, and just..be crazy. I'm not complaining on that part.

But sometimes, you just can't help but wish that he'd be like how he was when things were just starting out. You know, all those special things that he did. Maybe guys just don't know how much small, sweet gestures that they did previously are the things that we look forward to. Those are the small little things that make everything so special and precious. It doesn't take much to make our day, really. Like how I've read some other girls' blogs, all it takes was for their boyfriends to show a little that they care to make them feel like they're on top of the world and give more reasons to love their boyfriends even more.

Now, don't get me wrong. I still love Kai just as much, maybe a little more than I did the day before. I just can't help but missing those days like that. Okay in case he does an uproar of protest, he does send me home until my void deck after every date, he does send me a good morning message before going to school himself, he does stay up all night waiting for me if he's not tired out after a whole day's work/school, he does surprise me with his sudden burst of ______ (hahaha, you don't have to know about this =P), he does send me those sugarcoated text messages once in awhile, he still does have his own sweet ways to make me smile and make my knees go weak and he still is the caring boyfriend that I know for the past three years or so :) That, I'm very thankful for. And one more thing which I'd always be eternally grateful for is that he's one heck of a patient guy. Things were kind of rough for the past few months or so and were sort of hanging on the line, everyday was fluctuating like mad I tell you. But being the patient person that he is, he'd been tolerating all sorts of nonsense coming from me. For example, I insisted that he go meet other girls to get acquainted with and eventually start off something with them so that he'd have more choices or something. Yes, I've tested his patience far too many times for the past few months, bombarding him with my insecurities and I couldn't be any more happier now that everything is okay :) He still does make me feel like I'm the luckiest girl in the world because I am :)) And he's always there to comfort me, to be someone I can definitely lean on to and laugh my problems away, making me look like an idiot for mopping on such matters, no matter how trivial my problems may be. That's only a few of the reasons why I can never stop loving him even if I wanted to :)

Although I'm a bit mad when he called me fat/plump this afternoon -_-"
I need to be aneroxic. And bullimic. And probably I have to gulp down a whole bottle of laxatives to get rid of this extra weight. I'm fat plump, like how he'd put it. So now I need to be thin. Either that, or I go look around for him a thin, prettier and hotter girl. Hah, that wouldn't be so difficult. Haiy, the things we do for love. Hahahahahaha, okay that sentence wasn't necessary.

Labels: Kai, word diarrhoea