At first, it was pretty damn hard to even go near you, much less scroll down my contacts list and deliberate and contemplate so many bloody times on whether or not to text you a hello. At first, seeing you being so close with other girls, seeing you being so comfortable with other people, gave me that pang of ice cold jealousy that ate me from within until I had to turn away lest I end up hurling in anger.

It was that bad.

But, I really do have to agree with this cliched quote - Time heals all wounds. It really does. It took me time, a very long time indeed, to overcome this state of denial that I was in. I guess right now, it didn't matter how long it took because at the end of the day, I've always wanted you in my life, no matter what role you're playing. And now, you finally are, and playing not too bad a role in my life (:

It's getting kind of irksome, you know, our friends (his friends, mostly) are pining hopes for us to get back together. It would never happen, really. It's just one of my personal principles to never ever get back together with my ex-es, no matter how good a term we are on. That part doesn't matter. Sure, we can hang out, sure we can hang on the phone from hours till end, but that won't change the fact that we were once together and parted, and are now good friends. It'll just stop there.

And no, it's not weird or awkward to be friends again. In fact, it's much easier to be friends. We know each other inside out, that comfort level is there, that mutual understanding is there. He gets me, I get him - that's how we roll. I admit, it was hard initially. But after tonight, I'd almost forgotten how easy and how natural it is to be with him around. We hung out at the beach, and that was the place where we used to meet for our dates all the freaking time. It was much better this time round than the last (:

"Eheyyyy I remember this plaaaace..."

Haaaaah, that was just perfect, you know?

I can safely say I don't have anymore feelings for him at all. But one thing for sure, I do care about him. A lot. And I'm only human to feel slightly jealous whenever he begins talking about other girls whom he had some interest in. When he said that he can't find it in him to ever love another girl like how he loved me back then...that made me smile a little inside. Hey, I'm just a girl after all, yes? (: Because whatever he said, holds true for me too. I doubt I can ever love anyone else like how I loved him.

So we finally had our happy ending after all (:

Haha ini modern punya happy ending hor. Happy endings doesn't necessarily end with the hero and heroine being blissfully in love together. I like my happy ending just this way (:

Labels: Kai